Never Never
Outside the supermarket, beside the fiberglass horses,
women gossip about a dead child in the newspaper.
The mothers must blame the mother,
and they do; another way of saying
That will never happen to me.
My mother, buying milk and bread for her living children,
knows better.
I will sing an ode to fear and call it
Never Never Never.
I’ve made it too, the impossible promise
I will never let anything happen to you.
I will never let anything happen to you.
But I fell and watched my baby falling.
I thought I’ve ruined you.
I thought I’ve killed my child.
I must surely die.
And as I watched her, later, sleeping, hurt but
healing, I thought I will never
I will never
But I will.
And my mother is still walking to and from my sister’s grave.
And my daughter is older now than my sister lived to be.
And the women outside the supermarket
are still feeding quarters to the fiberglass horses, saying
Never Never Never
while their children lunge forward and are pulled
gently, mechanically back.
Milk & Water by Amy Watkins will be available for pre-orders soon, and fully released February 25th.
